Sunday Levity: A Father’s Pride

posted in: Life, Sunday Levity, Uncategorized | 3

Just as I did for Mother’s Day, I’m going to give equal love to the guy who is my dad.  He’s amazing and we are very much opposites.  He’s analytical and I’m not.  He’s got dad jokes up the wazoo and I’ve got biting sarcasm that got me in all sorts of trouble as a kid.  He likes all the Transformers movies and I’m more ambivalent about them.

Where we are alike is in our creative minds.  He’s an inventor at heart, always thinking of ways to expand technology in the world.  I can’t go into details but I’m pretty sure he could create a teleportation device.  He has a wealth of knowledge that I continue to draw from to this day.  Rather than telling me to go look it up on the internet (which is my default all too often), he will do his best to show me and teach me.

I’ve learned a great deal about the sacrifices a father makes for his wife and children through my dad.  He didn’t do everything right along the way but he’s made a substantial effort in keeping relationship with my sister and I as well as adopting our respective spouses, going out of his way to make them feel part of the family.  His example helps me to look forward to when I’m a dad myself.  He’s awesome and amazing in his own right and he should be proud to be my dad.

Thoughts Not Shared

posted in: Uncategorized, Writing | 2

Something I often wonder is if I should dare blog about more topical issues based on the current climate of our society here in the States.  I go back and forth on this for a number of reasons.  Does my opinion (because that’s what it is) matter?  Would I add anything of value to the conversation?  Is it a conversation or just a screaming match?  You get it, right?  It doesn’t take much effort to look through the porthole and find the rocks being thrown (verbally and physically these days) when it comes to opposing views.So let’s just talk more about storytelling!!!  Just kidding.  I wouldn’t tease you just for the sake of peaking interest.

For myself, I should state that I am not oblivious to the happenings outside of my bubble here in California, deep in the Mojave Desert.  I have taken an interest recently and at the beginning (I admit, I stayed clear of social issues/politics for several years simply because my interests lay elsewhere) I was left sort of at a loss.  I realized I knew very little about what was going on.  You’d think as a writer, I’d be more in tune with the world.  You thought wrong!  I’ve been more curious about other time periods to be honest (as a fantasy writer, you tend to focus more on that period called “Medieval”).

This post is not meant to convince anyone of anything.  Go back to one of my first posts back in January.  I believe wholeheartedly in the value of someone else’s opinions, thoughts, convictions, etc.  I’m not a salesman.  I gain nothing for trying to convert (it’s you who gains everything!  Kidding.  My smugness knows no bounds).  For myself, I’m simply trying to understand the world better and make sure I’m educated on history.  It’s the best resource we have to progressing and not committing the same mistakes.  Let’s not be a society that returns to its own vomit (gross but appropriate).

I’m of the opinion that people have value and that should not be based on ability.  Abilities can be lost or dwindle and therefore that means value can be lost.  Things without value are discarded and forgotten.  We should avoid this when it comes to people.  The greatest atrocities in history were committed because the value of others was diminished.  People are intrinsically valuable for the sake of their being alive.  Without going on a philosophical tangent, I’ll simply say that life is limited within the confines of time and what all people want is to find, experience, and maintain joy and to be loved.  I think those two basic needs can be sufficient for the purposes of this post.

As you’ve no doubt noticed, I haven’t and won’t likely dive into any hot button issues in these types of blog posts.  I’m not convinced it’s necessary for the time being.  I will offer my thoughts and you can either decide to read or not read them.  If you decide you disagree and feel the need to scream and yell, then it’ll fall on deaf ears because I control the comments.  If you write a blog, you can do the same thing for yourself.  If ever there is the chance for conversation (respectful and honoring each others views), then what will be welcomed.

There’s a vast need for discussions that are not based on anger.  Disagreement should be welcome.  There’s value in hearing and understanding someone else’s views.  That is not to say the more extreme views (anything that diminishes the value of another person) should be widely scrutinized.  Hate is an element of evil and that’s not what I’m talking about.  Opposing views can and should be invited into communities.

Call to Action: Find the gold in those you disagree with.  Obviously, you can’t do this with randoms on the interwebz.  Trolls are aplenty in the comment sections of YouTube and other websites.  However, everyone has people within the walls of their social circles (or at least you should) that has opposing views to your own.  If you know you can have a true conversation, then I would encourage you to do so.  You’ll learn some things from them and possibly yourself.  Happy living!!!

Criticism: Always Welcome

posted in: Uncategorized | 1

So today, I’m going to get into the mud a bit.  There’s one thing that an artist needs to be able take and take it well.  All criticism can be beneficial.  The good puffs you up and the bad lets the air out with a whimpering wheeze.  Is it a hard pill to swallow?  I mean like one of those multi-vitamins that’s the size of an ice cube and makes you think, “This is going to test my gag reflex”.  Yes, but, again, beneficial.

I admit, my experience with criticism has been on the side of easy so far.  I think that’s the natural progression of being an artist (or at least I’m jaded enough to hope so for the sake of the majority).  You create and you show your closest family and friends first.  They tell you nothing but good with some helpful suggestions and you feel like skipping and whistling around the block.  But then (ah, yes, the notorious “but then”) you take your art and throw it out beyond your trusted circle and get hammered.  I’ve been preparing myself for this confidence crippling event for a while now.  I know not everyone is going to think I’m the second coming of Tolkien (to be honest, though, I don’t want to be).

Criticism is inevitable.  Not just in the art world but everywhere.  Job performances are constantly being scrutinized and upon review time, you either get the good raise or the crappy one.  Your output determines your worth.  In our society, that’s true, especially in the work force.  In the arts, your output is subjective to preference.  That’s the good news.

If you don’t hone your craft and put the necessary effort into creating something you are proud of, knowing you gave it all, then expect harsh critics to stomp, gut, scratch, burn and view what you did as a waste of their time.  If you do hone your skills, then it’s more likely you will get the opposite reaction.

Now, as I’ve said before, you can’t please everyone.  It doesn’t even sound that good when you step back and consider the full range of that idea.  Imagine being surrounded by “yes men” who would fish your used tissue out of the trash and immortalize it on a mantle piece.  Yeah, not good.  And it doesn’t help you in the long run.  In art, you want to start but never be satisfied with just that single piece produced in the beginning.

There’s an innate creative desire inside artists that want to go beyond what they’ve done and challenge themselves to try new things, improve upon the old methods, and/or test their boundaries.  Art is daring in many respects.

Learning to take criticism is a must but it does not have to defeat us.  It should be taken but not be made a keepsake, used as an heirloom to pass down onto your children.

Here’s my diatribe: you cannot go through life afraid to be offended.  Everywhere we look, people base their entire happiness on whether or not others are allowed to say or do something that might offend them.  People outside of your inner circle are not going to be kind for the sake of keeping your feelings intact.  It’s a great disservice for us as a society to travel this road.

I’m a writer.  There are going to people who love what I write and there are going to be people who tell me I should seek another profession.  Is that hurtful?  Sure but only if I determine that another person’s personal preference, taste, and/or critique has power over my passions, dreams and desires.

A good way to prepare yourself for the future of criticism is to ask yourself some basic questions:

Why am I doing this?
What do I want to accomplish?

How do I want my art to have an impact in the world?

If any of these involve an answer of attaining money or acceptance, then I think we’ve found the problem.  Neither of these (here’s the cliché) can bring you true satisfaction or happiness.  They just leave you wanting more.  You will become an addict, getting a fix but then wanting more to meet your needs.  It’s not worth it!  Search for and find the answers to these questions that include you being happy despite what others can give you.

Trust in your abilities.  Trust that what you produce comes from a genuine place of joy.  It’s easy to say grow thick skin and you’ll be fine but I think it goes deeper.  Pleasing everyone is impossible no matter what you do in life and as we’ve all discovered in our social media culture, avoid the comment sections on YouTube.  There are a lot of trolls out there on the interwebz who seriously have nothing better to do than spread hate and horrible vitriol that somehow makes them feel accomplished.  Ignore them.  Avoid the places where you know people will purposely try to be hurtful.  You deserve better.

Call to Action: Answer the questions above honestly.  If you find that your answers have some bad motives, then consider why.  Pursue a path that changes these to what I’ve hopefully provided as helpful.